


Things Rudy Miller Doesn't Do

by gala_apples



Category: I Want To Go Home! - Gordon Korman
Genre: M/M, Object Insertion
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-08
Updated: 2012-10-08
Packaged: 2017-11-15 21:24:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/531870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gala_apples/pseuds/gala_apples
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rudy hates being the centre of attention. Unfortunately both the fucker and the fuckee are the star of the bed.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Things Rudy Miller Doesn't Do

“I don’t do girls.”

Mike stares up the at ceiling, knowing Rudy well enough to know he can’t come off interrogative, complete with a pinning stare. It’s bad enough that Rudy will see his body language and read it perfectly, like he does everything else. As soon as he looks over he’ll know Mike’s hopefully ecstatic about the statement. There’s no telling how Rudy’ll react to that.

Coming out himself hasn’t been enough to jar Rudy into doing the same, although Mike’s had suspicions of bisexuality for a while now. You can’t be that hot and that well groomed and that knowledgeable and that perfect of a date and not be available for people’s interests. Mike’s never even considered asking. Their friendship works primarily on a basis of Rudy being in charge, which includes not being asked questions. But he asks now, because he needs to know more than he needs to not upset Rudy.

“Do you mean you don’t do them like you don’t do sports, like you should be in the Olympics but hate the attention? Or do you mean-”

“I don’t do that gender. Is what I mean.” 

As always, Rudy sounds very stilted when he has to explain himself. Reassuring him will just make it worse. Still, there’s a difference between a not straight Rudy and a Rudy that wants him.

“Are you-”

“You know who I’m interested in.”

*

“I don’t bottom.”

Mike shrugs. When he started this he really didn’t think he’d be bottoming the rest of his life, but he probably should have figured. “That’s fine, fuck me then.”

“I don’t top.”

“So are you. What are you saying?” Mike’s dick deflates completely and he moves his hand from Rudy’s thigh. “So are you saying you’re not gay? Because five minutes ago with your hand on my cock and a finger circling my asshole you were pretty gay.”

“I’m saying that I don’t top or bottom.” No reassurance that he’s still gay, still wants him. Of course. He wouldn’t be Rudy if he reassured, or had other empathetic qualities.

*

The only way Mike’s going to get what he wants -namely, penetration- is if he does it himself. It’s time to go back to his old habits. Mike kinda figured it wouldn’t happen once he had a solid boyfriend -the same way you figure you’ll never need to jerk off again- but he can’t say he’s all that upset about having to unearth old fallbacks. There’s a reason he did it more than once. 

The first time he was a teenager, frustrated with his own lack of coordination. He wasn’t able to multitask well enough to jerk off and finger himself, but every part of him was aching to be filled. So he’d grabbed the phallic shaped bottle of lube and worked it inside himself. Somewhere between jerking off frantically and coming with a muffled scream Mike had squeezed hard enough around it that the pressure opened the bottle cap and it had drained itself onto his bed. He’d had to sleep in a wet spot the size of a tire, but it had been worth it. Not to mention once washed, the empty bottle was a good item for multiple insertions.

Somewhere along the line it turned from convenience to kink. It’s hot, looking around a room and imaging how he’d use different things. There’s always _something_. It’s a perk to having a kink like object insertion; there are a near infinite number of things he can use, depending on spaces and situations. 

Mike can just imagine what Rudy would say. It would start with ‘I don’t do’ and end in ‘inanimate objects’. Luckily he’s not and has never been like Rudy Miller. Not even when they first met at summer camp and joined forces against evil like clones, work detail, and Harold Greene did Mike manage to be like Rudy. He’s never much been jealous and in this case Mike knows he’s got the better deal. No doubt Rudy’s yet to be revealed kink is as complicated as he is.

*

It’s sneaky, and he’s never felt particularly comfortable trying to get around Rudy, but desperate times call for desperate measures. So when Rudy rolls over and starts kissing his shoulder, Mike makes an excuse then takes off to the bathroom. In the shampoo caddy in the shower he’s hidden a bottle of lube. It’s barely distinguishable if you’re not looking.

It sends a sharp thrill through him when he reaches for the bedside table. Two days ago it was filled with junk. This morning he moved everything temporarily to the kitchen drawer so the flashlight would be the only object he could grab. He had to plan ahead, it’s not like he could turn his head to check, not when he’d be busy kissing Rudy. Kissing is one of the few areas Mike’d like the think he’s as good as Rudy. Sometimes practice does make perfect. Or at least makes it possible to match to innate ability.

The problem with most objects is that they aren’t tapered like the few toys Mike’s ever tried have been, or the way a cock is. That’s what prepping himself in the bathroom is for; so by the time he’s in bed, hard and sweaty on top of Rudy, his body is ready to go. The flashlight has a flat bottom, but it’s also thinner than some of the things he’s used. Mike shimmies on top of Rudy until his legs are naturally splayed and presses the base of it against his asshole until his body accepts it. It’s a good stretch, a stretch he _needs_. And if he momentarily snickers wondering if an ill placed clench will turn it on and a light will literally shine out his ass, well, why does sex have to be serious? 

*

“So I guess you probably think this whole thing is pathetic, right?” Mike asks, waving the flashlight at Rudy. It’s still sticky with lube. He hasn’t been able to get out of bed to wash it yet. Rudy surprisingly _does_ do post sex snuggling, and hasn’t felt the need to let go of him.

“I don’t shame people.”

Really, from Rudy that’s about all the answer he’s going to get. Mike decides he’ll take it.


End file.
